“You think too much!” When this was said, I thought it was the stupidest thing I had ever heard! I considered it a ridiculous statement made by someone who had no clue what they were talking about.

It’s taken me over 40 years to begin to understand. She was actually right.

I was a teenager when my mother said those words to me. At the time, filled with the passion of youth, I was convinced that my mother had no idea what she was talking about. I thought she was telling me that I was crazy for thinking deeply about things.

Thankfully I did not say my thoughts out loud to her, but in my head, I was thinking….“Maybe you don’t think enough!”

I felt like I was surrounded by people that didn’t think. Didn’t want to think. Were too shallow to think.

Ah, misguided youth! I continued to feel she was wrong to have said that to me until the past few months. Until then, I’ve told the story many times, always presenting myself as the one who was misunderstood.

But recently, it has occurred to me that it was actually my mother who was misunderstood. She was right. I did think too much. I DO think too much. I worry about everything. I plan for everything. I consider everything. And all that thinking makes me anxious.

I have no doubt now that she saw that anxiety and was trying to steer me away from the very thing that was causing it. But her words were not able to compete with my vast teenage wisdom. I then allowed the teenager in me to be ‘right’ for a very long time.

It has started to dawn on me that there was wisdom in her comment. A few weeks ago, I began listening to a book entitled Living Untethered by Michael A. Singer. It’s an excellent, life-changing book, and I highly recommend it. He spends much of the book unpacking the trouble our thoughts get us into and how to find freedom from unhelpful thinking.

Hearing his words reminded me of my mom’s statement all those years ago. And suddenly, I understood. I saw my response for what it was, the self-righteous delusion of youth. That misguided youthful response has followed me into middle age.

I’m going forward now with a new appreciation for what she was trying to say.

Thinking isn’t wrong. But overthinking can cause trouble. And it is indeed possible to overthink. She knew this. And now I know it too. Thanks for trying, Mom. It took a while, but I hear you now.